It's the final week of the Drunkard's Wife QAL and it's time to assemble our quilt top. You might want to sober up for this part unless you want a jacked up quilt top.

To finish our top, we'll need:

• (1) Fat Eighth for corner stones
• .75 yards for sashing
• 1.625 yards for outer border (or 1 yard if you're okay with piecing them)

From your FE, cut (20) 2.5" square cornerstones. 

From the sashing fabric cut (2) 12.5" WOF strips, then subcut (31) 12.5" x 2.5" sashing strips.

If you are piecing your borders, cut (6) 5.5" WOF strips and sew them end to end to make a single loooong strip. Then subcut (2) 5.5" x 58.5" pieces and (2) 54.5" pieces. If you aren't piecing your borders, just cut those (4) pieces along the length of fabric. 

Make a horizontal sashing border with (4) cornerstones and (3) sashing strips as illustrated below. Press all seams towards the sashing strips. Make (5) of these.

Make a row of blocks with (3) of your blocks and (4) sashing strips as illustrated above. Press all seams towards the sashing strips. Make (4) of these.

Next, sew your horizontal sashing borders and rows of blocks together, pinning at the seams and nesting them. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy.

Finish your top of with the borders. Sew the 58.5" pieces to the sides of the quilt top and press seams towards the borders. Then sew the 54.5" pieces to the top and bottom of the top, pressing the seams towards the borders. And there you have it! A quilt that will make your grandmother disown you.

Thank you to everyone who participated in my first quilt-along! Don't forget to share you quilt tops on Instagram with the #DrunkardsWifeQAL hashtag!

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini | Week 4: Mint Julep | Week 5: Mimosa | Week 6: Mai Tai | Week 7: Sangria | Week 8: Amaretto Sour | Week 9: Pina Colada | Week 10: Sake Bomb | Week 11: Long Island Iced Tea | Week 12: White Russian

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 12: White Russian

It's the last block of the Drunkard's Wife QAL! Today we're making the White Russian. You will need to cut:

Colored Fabric #1

• A - (2) - 7" square
• B - (3) - 4.5" square

Background Fabric

• C - (3) - 4.5" square
• D - (6) - 3" square

Pair up a B and C square and make a batch of HSTs using the 4-at-a-time method. Trim each HST to 2.5" square. Repeat with the remaining B and C squares until you have (12) HSTs.

Cut your A and D squares in half diagonally.

To make each quadrant of the block, you will need to piece (3) HSTs, (3) D triangles, and (1) A triangle. Sew the HSTs and D triangles together in rows as illustrated, then sew those rows together to make a triangle. Then put your pieced triangle and the A triangle right sides together and sew along the diagonal edge with your usual .25" seam allowance. It's way easier than it looks. Make (4) quadrants.

What we're supposed to do is lay the four quadrants out as illustrated and sew them all together.

Instead...*sigh*...do I even need to tell you at this point? As usual, your block will be 12.5" square.

Next week will be our last week and, we'll be assembling the quilt top! 

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini | Week 4: Mint Julep | Week 5: Mimosa | Week 6: Mai Tai | Week 7: Sangria | Week 8: Amaretto Sour | Week 9: Pina Colada | Week 10: Sake Bomb | Week 11: Long Island Iced Tea

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 11: Long Island Iced Tea

For week 11 of the Drunkard's Wife QAL, we're making the Long Island Iced Tea block. You'll need to cut:

Colored Fabric #1

• A - (3) - 6" square
• B - (8) - 2.5" square

Background Fabric

• C - (3) - 6" square
• D - (4) - 2.5" square

This one's easier than it looks! Use the A and C squares to make (24) 2.5" unfinished HSTs using the 8 at a time method. Next, arrange (6) HSTs, (2) B pieces, and (1) D piece to make the little birdies below and sew the pieces together.

What we're supposed to do is lay the four birdies out as illustrated and sew them all together.

Instead, yell "I do what I want!" in a tiny birdy voice. "We're going SOUTH, bitches!" Finished block measures 12.5" square, unfinished.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini | Week 4: Mint Julep | Week 5: Mimosa | Week 6: Mai Tai | Week 7: Sangria | Week 8: Amaretto Sour | Week 9: Pina Colada | Week 10: Sake Bomb

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 10: Sake Bomb

For week 10 of the Drunkard's Wife QAL, we're making the Sake Bomb block. You'll need to cut:

Background Fabric

• A - (8) - 3" square
• B - (4) - 2.5" x 4.5" 

Colored Fabric #1

• C - (4) - 2.5" x 4.5" 
• D - (4) - 3.375" square

Colored Fabric #2

• E - (1) - 4.5" square

Cut each A piece in half diagonally to make (16) triangles. Using (4) of those triangles and (1) D square, follow this tutorial to make a square-in-a-square block. Trim the block to 4.5" square, taking care to leave the .25" allowance like we did with the Mai Tai block. Repeat to make a total of (4) blocks.

Place a B piece and C piece right sides together and sew along the 4.5" edge. Press seam towards the darker fabric. Repeat with the remaining (3) B/C pairs.

What we're supposed to do is lay these (9) 4.5" squares out as illustrated and sew them all together.

Instead, shout, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" and do whatever you please. Finished block measures 12.5" square, unfinished.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini | Week 4: Mint Julep | Week 5: Mimosa | Week 6: Mai Tai | Week 7: Sangria | Week 8: Amaretto Sour | Week 9: Pina Colada

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 9: Pina Colada

For week 9 of the Drunkard's Wife QAL, we're making the Pina Colada block. You'll need to cut:

Background Fabric

• A - (3) - 6" square
• B - (2) - 4.5" square

Colored Fabric #1

• C - (3) - 6" square

Colored Fabric #2

• D - (1) - 4.5" square

Pair up an A and C square to make (8) 2.5" unfinished HSTs using the 8 at a time method. Repeat with the remaining A and C squares for a total of (24) HSTs.

What we're supposed to do is lay the HSTs and remaining squares out as illustrated, sew them into rows, and sew those rows together.

Instead, bust out the champagne because we're celebrating New Year's early. Your drunk self will take care of the rest. As usual, finished block measures 12.5" square.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini | Week 4: Mint Julep | Week 5: Mimosa | Week 6: Mai Tai | Week 7: Sangria | Week 8: Amaretto Sour

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 8: Amaretto Sour

For week 8 of the Drunkard's Wife QAL, we're making the Amaretto Sour block. You'll need to cut:

Background Fabric

• A - (2) - 8" square

Colored Fabric #1

• B - (2) - 8" square

Pair up an A and B square to make (8) 3.5" unfinished HSTs using the 8 at a time method. Repeat with the remaining A and B squares for a total of (16) HSTs.

What we're supposed to do is lay the HSTs out as illustrated, sew them into rows, and sew those rows together.

Instead, do the thing. DO IT. DO ITTTTTT. Your finished block should measure 12.5" square.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini | Week 4: Mint Julep | Week 5: Mimosa | Week 6: Mai Tai | Week 7: Sangria

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 7: Sangria

For week 7 of the Drunkard's Wife QAL, we're making the Sangria block. You'll need to cut:

Background Fabric

• A - (1) - 6" square
• B - (4) - 2.5" square
• C - (1) 4.5" square

 Colored Fabric #1

• D - (1) - 6" square
• E - (4) - 2.5" squares

 Colored Fabric #2

• F - (4) - 4.5" square

Start by using your A and D square to make (8) 2.5" unfinished HSTs using the 8 at a time method. Use these HSTs, the B pieces, and E pieces to make (4) arrow/dart/whatever you call these things.

What we're supposed to do is lay the darts, C, and F pieces out as illustrated, sew them into rows, and sew those rows together.

Instead, f*ck sh*t up. You're driving the sewing machine, so you're the captain now. When you're done, your block should measure 12.5" square.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini | Week 4: Mint Julep | Week 5: Mimosa | Week 6: Mai Tai

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 6: Mai Tai

For week 6 of the Drunkard's Wife QAL, we're making the Mai Tai block. You'll need to cut:

Background Fabric

• A - (1) - 4.75" square
• B - (1) - 5.75" square
• C - (1) 7.25" square

 Colored Fabric #1

• D - (1) - 5.75" square
• E - (2) - 4" squares
• F - (4) - 3.875" squares

Once again, I forgot to photograph my pieces before sewing them up. Deal with the doodle.

Start by cutting your (2) E pieces in half on the diagonal. Use this tutorial to make a square-in-a-square block with the E triangles and your A piece. Trim your block to 6.5" square, making sure you have a .25" seam allowance between around the center A square.

Next, make (4) HSTs with your B and D pieces using the four at a time method. Trim each HST to 3.5" square.

Lastly, make (4) flying geese with your C and F pieces using the no waste method we've previously used. Each geese should measure 3.5" x 6.5" unfinished.

What we're supposed to do is lay these pieces out as illustrated, sew them into rows, and sew those rows together.

Instead...you know the drill. Be lucky it's not a real drill. If it was, you might hurt yourself with it in your drunken state. When you're done, your block should measure 12.5" square.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini | Week 4: Mint Julep | Week 5: Mimosa

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 5: Mimosa

For week 5 of the Drunkard's Wife QAL, we're making the Dutchman's Puzzle Mimosa block. You'll need to cut:

Colored Fabric #1

• A - (2) - 7.25" x 7.25"

Background Fabric

• B - (8) 3.875" x 3.875"

As you can see, I forgot to photograph my pieces before sewing them up. Please accept this doodle.

Using (1) A square and (4) B squares, follow this tutorial to make (4) flying geese at one time. They should measure 3.5" x 6.5" when finished. Repeat with the remaining A and B pieces for a total of (8) geese.

What we're supposed to do is lay these (8) geese out as illustrated, sew them into (4) pairs, and sew those quadrants together.

Instead, make some mistakes. Throw that goose for a loop. Shoot it with bird shot. I dunno.

When you're done, your block should measure 12.5" square.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini | Week 4: Mint Julep

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 3: Mint Julep

For Week 4 of the Drunkard's Wife QAL, we'll be making the Ohio Star Mint Julep block.

Center Square

• A - (1) 4.5" x 4.5"

Background Fabric

• B - (4) - 4.5" x 4.5"
• C - (2) - 5.5" x 5.5"

Colored Fabric #1

• D - (2) - 5.5" x 5.5"

Follow this tutorial to make (4) quarter square triangles with your C and D pieces. Each C + D pair will yield (2) quarter square triangles. Trim them to 4.5" square. 

What we're supposed to do is lay these (9) 4.5" squares out as illustrated and sew them all together.

Instead, make some mistakes. Rotate a quarter square triangle 90 degrees. Chew on it a little bit. Whatever you do, make sure it cause restaurant employees to offer you the children's menu because you're obviously...special.

When you're done, your block should measure 12.5" square.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler | Week 3: Dirty Martini

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 3: Dirty Martini

For Week 3 of the Drunkard's Wife QAL, we'll be making the Dirty Martini block. I have no earthly clue what the traditional name of this block is.  You'll need to cut:

Center Square

• A - (1) 4.5" x 4.5"

Colored Fabric #1

• B - (4) - 2.5" x 4.5"

Background Fabric

• C - (4) - 2.5" x 4.5"
• E - (8) - 2.5" x 2.5"

Colored Fabric #2

• D - (4) 4.5" x 4.5"

Sew (1) B and (1) C piece together along the 4.5" edge and press seam towards the darker fabric. Repeat with the remaining B and C pieces.

On the wrong side of your E pieces, mark a diagonal line. Follow the steps under "creating the X branches" according to this tutorial with your D and E pieces. 

What we're supposed to do is lay these (9) 4.5" squares out as illustrated and sew them all together.

Instead, make some mistakes. Flip a block around, spill your drink on it, whatever.
Whatever you do, make sure it would make the Quilt Police beat you with those scary ouchy sticks. Don't you know that you're a disgrace to the quilting tradition?!

When you're done, your block should measure 12.5" square.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star | Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 2: Whiskey Tumbler

For week 2, we're making the churn dash Whiskey Tumbler block. For this block you'll need to cut the following :

Background Fabric

• A - (1) 4.5" x 4.5" 
• B - (4) 2.5" x 4.5" 
• C - (2) 5" x 5" 

Fabric #1

• D - (2) 5" x 5"

Fabric #2

• E - (4) 2.5" x 4.5"

Make (4) half square triangles with your C and D pieces using the two at a time method. Press seam towards the darker fabric. Trim each HST to 4.5" square.

Place a B piece and an E piece right sides together and sew along the 4.5" edge. Press seam towards the darker fabric. Repeat with the remaining (3) B/E pairs.

What we're supposed to do is lay these (9) 4.5" squares out as illustrated and sew them all together.



Instead, make some mistakes. Rotate an HST the wrong way. Mix up the layout.
Whatever you do, make sure it make your teacher say, "See me after class." You obviously shouldn't have graduated kindergarten.

When you're done, your block should measure 12.5" square.

Now your Whiskey Tumbler block is finished!Share your block on IG with the hashtag #DrunkardsWifeQAL.

Previously: Introduction | Week 1: Happy Hour Star

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along Week 1: Happy Hour Star

Welcome to week one of the #DrunkardsWifeQAL! If you haven't read the intro post, I'll be hosting quilt-along for making an intentionally f*cked up quilt. Why? Because cocktails, that's why.



As I was prepping my blog posts for the QAL, I tried to find the traditional names for these quilt blocks. Some I already knew and some I was able to quickly find with some Google magic. But there were still several that I couldn't identify, so I just figured, "screw it." I'm going to rename all of these blocks after kinds of booze.

We're starting simple for week one with the classic sawtooth star Happy Hour Star block. For this block you'll need to cut the following :

Background Fabric

• A - (1) 6.5" x 6.5"
• B - (4) 3.5" x 3.5" 
• C - (4) 4" x 4"

Fabric #1 (I used assorted blue prints)

• D - (4) 4" x 4"

Make (4) half square triangles with your C and D pieces using the two at a time method. I cut my squares in half diagonally prior to sewing them so I wouldn't having matching pairs of HSTs.  Press seam towards the darker fabric. Trim each HST to 3.5" square. That link also includes a tutorial for how to make them 4 at a time if you're feeling fancy, but your drunk ass probably can't handle it.

What we're supposed to do is lay the HSTs and remaining pieces out as illustrated and sew them all together.



Instead, make some mistakes. Flip your HSTs around. Mix up the layout. Instead, make some mistakes. Rotate an HST the wrong way. Mix up the layout. Whatever you do, make sure it would be a disappointment to your mother. She raised you better than that, but you're an ADULT and you can do whatever you want!

When you're done, your block should measure 12.5" square, but who knows? You're drunk. Anything is possible.

Next, do a field sobriety test. Can you say the alphabet backwards? No? How about forwards? Good enough. Now download the pattern for some sassy embroidery and print it at 100%.

Transfer the design onto your center square using your preferred method. I like to trace patterns with a Frixion pen since the ink disappears with an iron. Pick some embroidery floss and and use a backstitch (or whatever stitch you want) to embroider the pattern.


Now your Happy Hour Star block is finished! Show it off to the quilt police and watch them twitch in agony! Share your block on IG with the hashtag #DrunkardsWifeQAL. I'd love to see your abominations. Previously: Introduction

Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along: Introduction

So, have you ever witnessed your friend proudly show off their new quilt, and noticed that they made a dumb mistake somewhere?  You try not to rain on their parade, but you can't help but be like:

That reaction was the inspiration for a fun Quilt A-long. It combines two activities I cherish: quilting and drinking. I'm calling it The Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along.

We've all been there. We've gotten tipsy at quilt retreats or had a little too much with dinner, but hey! We got quilts to make! And then we make oopsies. It's time to celebrate those stupid mistakes. The Drunkard's Wife Quilt-Along is an exercise in f***ing up. 

The basic directions are simple. Make a block and screw it up. Do you remember that part in Fight Club where Tyler instructs the guys to get into a fight and lose? It's kinda like that. 

Some of you perfectionists are probably reading this like:

But guess what?

We're grown ass women and we can make some jacked up quilts if we want.

I'll be sharing 12 simple blocks with you on a weekly basis. You can turn it into a monthly BOM/cocktail hour with your friends. Get shwasty while you stitch or do it sober. But there is only one rule: no perfect blocks allowed.

Here's the rest of the basic housekeeping notes.

The finished quilt will measure 54" x 68". 

Fabric: You will need:

• (1) Fat Eighth for corner stones
• .75 yards for sashing
• 1.625 yards for borders (or 1 yard if you're okay with piecing them)
• 4 yards for backing
• .5 yard for binding
• 58" x 72" batting
• Some embroidery floss (optional)

For your actual blocks, we're taking this the scrappy route, so pull a stack of fat quarters or your scrap bin. I'm not going to give you yardage since different people will want to approach their blocks in different ways. I'm not your mama! Figure it out! We're drinking here, not entering a math tournament.

I'll be starting on November 2nd. Keep up with updates on IG using the hashtag #DrunkardsWifeQAL and #DrunkardsWifeQuilt.